Author / Gibran Cruz

Unknown's avatar

Posts by Gibran Cruz

Free psychologist for friends, shaper of thoughts and words. Advice of all sorts. Fixer by nature, coffee lover. This is the way i see...
by Gibran Cruz

A Place For Us…

I have a safe house. He built it for me. Is the place I go when all seems to be wrong. It’s filled with all the things that makes me feel safe and happy again. It’s a two story house, sky blue with cream details. It has a beautiful garden with flowers and vegetables; he takes care of it, he is better at it than me. My house is in a clearing surrounded by soft grass and has  a lake beside it. Sometimes we do picnics outside in the grass…when I feel better.

It is beautiful inside. Big spaces so I can spend the time walking inside. A nice kitchen where i like to bake and look outside the window while i wait because I can see Him working on my garden. I know He is just waiting for me. No matter how angry or sad I am, He always does, never leaves me alone. There are just a few things inside the house. We are not supposed to be there for long. We have to work things out fast, you see, because emotions tend to build up. You don’t want bad ones taking the place of LOVE. House is decorated with memories. Good ones. That jar filled with sand, seashells and stones? I remember that trip to the beach…We laughed so much.

When I’m tired I go up the stairs. I’m looking at all the pictures on my way up. We are so happy in all of them. You put them there to remind us of how good we are together. So in Love. Family trips, you looking hot in that shirt I gave you. I remember when I bought it for you. I love the one where you are sleeping, you look like a kid on that one! This room is so big…light cream with a touch of peaceful blue. You chose the colors. most of it is empty. I’m not supposed to sleep here more than a day. I love to look out the window, you are always there. You smile, I wave, you walk away. Where are you? I always cry when I’m here. Later I  feel better after I’ve seen our memories, the ones we made together. Keyword…TOGETHER. After a while I always get this feeling like there is someone there…Then I feel your arms around me, a soft kiss. I hear the words “I Love You, lets talk”’…We go to bed. I know we wont sleep. We are never here more than a day…

gibypea3

by Gibran Cruz

Between Two Worlds

I read in a book that casualties doesn’t exist. That everything is written between the clouds and stars with invisible ink. That people get mixed in other people’s story pages to share and star in a pre-established script. That we are all lead and secondary characters depending on the part of the movie we are in. Don’t you think it’s an amazing way to talk about the people that are destined to be in your life?

It’s scary how people take residence in your heart. When you are in LDR the feeling of missing that special someone never goes away. You cant help the longing you feel when without knowing it there isn’t a single day that passes without you thinking about silly conversations, crying while remembering the strength it takes to have this kind of relationship or when you daydream about a future together.

That day, you know they have an apartment in the condo of your heart. You now live between two worlds…yours and theirs. It feels like you are just  waiting and wishing until those worlds collide and you can start calling it “our world”.

In the meantime the are a lot of things that help. In my LDR I learned to keep my SO updated about my day because he isn’t there with me and that help us to feel a little more connected. I learned that a simple detail like a call in the middle of the day, a text, pictures, sending him things, can make the waiting easier.  Keeping a countdown where you can see it helps to keep your spirits up and reminds you that what you are building day by day is real. It takes time, patience, courage and determination but in the end, when you don’t have to miss your SO anymore, you will know it was worth it. The Waiting (for the next call, text or visit), the wishing (to be finally together)… you will look back knowing it only made  your relationship stronger, better.

I miss my SO like crazy when he is not around. After two years I understand that missing someone is like the love you feel for them, it never stops growing. The people we love become part of ourselves, even when they are so far away.

Inspired by the writing prompt Saudade at LDRBN. If you want to read more click Here. Interested in joining? Don’t forget to mention my name Gibran.